My first-grade portfolio, 1994 to 1995

I opened up my first-grade portfolio, from the 1994 to 1995 school year, and it is full of the earliest school photos I have of myself.

The first one stopped me cold. It is me, around Christmas, sitting in a tiny classroom chair holding a black panther. I have a vague memory that it was a class stuffed animal, maybe something our class “adopted” at the zoo, and everyone got a turn having their picture taken with it. Here is why it got me. I have had a little black cat in my life for thirteen years now. So there I am at six, already holding my black panther, decades early. It is almost like the universe was tipping its hand.

The portfolio also has my very first and very last day of the year, both photographed in front of the same birthday-cake bulletin board.

On the first day, in a yellow shirt, I wrote this, without help, on September 1, 1994: “My name is Todd. I am a boy. I am five years old. I feel happy about my first day of school. I like writing.”

For the record, I was actually six. Precision came later.

By the last day, in a different shirt, I had apparently leveled up. On May 31, 1995, again without help, I wrote: “My name is Todd. This year I have learned many things. First I learned my ABC. Second I learned to write. Learning this year makes me feel happy.”

I love that “first I learned my ABC, second I learned to write” was, at the time, the entire curriculum of becoming a person.

At the very back there is a note in what I am pretty sure is my mom’s handwriting. The portfolio asked her what changes she noticed across the year, and she wrote that my penmanship had improved and I seemed to be progressing nicely, and then, “I’m proud of you.” It also asked her to leave a positive note for me, and she wrote: “Thanks for trying your best in school, being responsible, and a pleasure to be with.” A slightly formal review for a six-year-old, maybe, but I will take it.